Never Enough

The lack of responsibility in my life right now provides a great deal of freedom, but it also leaves me feeling very unmotivated and misdirected at times. With such few commitments during the week as a result of all of my friends being committed to showing up at an actual job, paired with the fact the games are the sweetest in the evenings and on the weekends, it leaves me with a ton of free time; that I feel like I'm pissing away.

Somehow, I need to find a way to add more structure to my lifestyle. I've worked on self control and tolerance with regards to poker and other things in recent months and feel I've had fair success, but moreover with regards to poker.

Since I'm fairly isolated when I'm grinding a lot, when I finally do get around people I sometimes explode with conversation and sometimes I feel I'd have a more meaningful conversation with a chain-link fence. It's usually those who... know me? the best. It's probably a side effect of my decisions as of late. I honestly could not care less, it just makes me want to get out and meet more and more people which is a far more positive side effect than becoming caught up in their insecurities and shortcomings.

All that aside, I really do need to lock down with poker for the end of the month. With the WCOOP I became sloppy at reviewing before playing a set of DoNs, so my game is leaking and results are showing because of it. So I need to fall back into the act of studying soo regularly again.

I think that's one of the things potential winners overlook so much, the great value in reviewing your own and your friends sessions. I think that will be what takes me from a breakeven (at best) cash player to a phenomenal (I hope?) cash game player at various games. Whenever I do finally dedicate to cash games full time it will be a pretty intense learning experience for me. Cash games interest me quite a lot, that alone sort of drives me to want to get in crush mode and rebuild this account.

I've been listening to Blueprint 3 a ton lately, probably more than I listened to any album as of late, Drake mixtapes aside. I've just started listening through Kid Cudi's debut album, Man on the Moon, a couple times and it's growing on me. I knew I wouldn't like it right off the bat, but it's a great album after playing through it a bit.

K, I've gotta blaze, do some laundry, shower, review, and hit the felt for a bit.